My Precious Luke,
I wonder if you know how much I miss you.
I wonder if you know how much I wish you were here.
I wonder if you know that every time I get in the car I wish you were sitting behind me in your car seat.
I wonder what you would have wanted on your first birthday.
I wonder if you would have been like your mommy and daddy and would have started walking at 9 months.
I wonder how much you would light up the room when you smiled.
I wonder if by now you would have grown into those muscular little legs you were born with.
I wonder what your giggles sound like.
I wonder what "mommy" would have sounded like coming out of that sweet little mouth of yours.
I wonder if you know how much all your younger siblings will miss you.
I wonder how much you and I would have loved our bonding time when I would nurse you.
I wonder if you know that every time I look at your daddy I see your sweet little face.
I wonder if you know how almost every sentence and every thought in my mind ends with, "Luke should be here."
I wonder if you know how much you will always be a major part of our family.
I wonder when I will get to hold you again.
I wonder if you know that there is nothing in this world I would not do to have you back.
I wonder if you know that no matter where we go or what we do in this life, Rob and Sarah will always be your mommy and daddy.
I wonder if you know that my heart will always have a piece missing, a piece you took with you on the day you went to heaven. That piece is yours forever Luke - nothing can ever replace that.
I wonder if you know that I will always wonder what you are doing, where you are, and I will always wonder if you know how much I love you.
I wonder if you know that you are the greatest love I have ever known.
I wonder what it would be like if I didn't have to wonder....